Tuesday, May 16, 2006

The Choice:






God bless the artist, Theo, who created the above landscape with a computer program. I was looking for web images while googling "the choice", and I think this picture could not more perfectly illustrate my point! Click on the link above to find his website. Thanks, sir!

Ballastexistenz had seen a movie put out by autism speaks that she found somewhat condescending. I had just recieved a link to the same production by one of the mothers in a parents group I have attended for four years.

Now, I am not belittling those mothers, although it may sound like it. I am just looking back to my own past, and how I saw autism once, versus how I see it now. It has been a gradual turning...but it is so much freer now that I have made "the choice ".

I don't know how to tell them that the great ball and chain they have around their own necks is somewhat of their own making. Remember how, in the good book, Jesus says his burden is light? I wonder if he meant only in the cases where the mothers didn't have autistic children...?

From the film, one would think there was NO JOY IN AUTISMLAND...

Okay, so my son is mild...maybe that has something to do with it?

NADA! Ben's great-godmother began a school for her daughter Judy, who is my age, nearing 50, and I don't think she has ever spoken a word. I was good friends with Judy's sister Mary Ann, and I never heard Judy do anything but yell in a high-pitched, excited voice while flapping furiously when I would come in the door. I think she liked me! But their mother was one of the happiest people I have ever known, and started a new way of seeing autistic kids, who, because of her, stayed home a few more years rather than being sent to institutions in their youth to "help the family". Judy was home until she was 18, unheard of in those days. Mrs. Hunt changed the world for Judy, not Judy for the world.

So, here's the deal.

You have a child who is autistic? You have 2 choices. You can change your child for the world, or you can change the world for your child.

Guess which is easier to do???????

5 comments:

Kristina Chew said...

And you can change yourself and find a life as beautiful--ful of colors never imagined---

That video brought out a lot of feelings in me---sympathy and sadness, and annoyance. Because there is plenty of joy in Autismland, indeed.

Thanks for this!

Adelaide Dupont said...

The second one, of course.

I would choose it for any autistic children who came under my responsibility and for myself.

Jannalou said...

I'm posting the story here. There is (or soon will be) a "Table of Contents" on the side so that navigation is slightly easier.

I hope you enjoy it!

r.b. said...

Life is beautiful, Kristina...It's all in how you look at it. There is a richness, a bounty, and one knows they are lucky to be alive!

Peggy Lou Morgan said...

I absolutely agree about the choices. That's why I wrote Parenting Your Complex Child to show that systems within the community need to be adapted to make a better life for a child as an individual.

I do think it is a choice.

Many people say that we are chosen to be mothers. I think there may be some of that but I really believe we become different because of making the choice to make things work our children.

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